Mr Thomas Beatie had a baby girl last year, and Susan Beatie turns one in 2 weeks.
the happy family with barbara w.
But Beatie has just given birth to his second child the past week. Shortly before that, he was interviewed by veteran journalist and media personality Barbara Walters, and explained that he wasn’t ”trying to change (people’s) minds, just asking (them) to open them”.
Beatie evidently belongs to a group of people that sees this as the norm; it is socially acceptable for couples such as themselves to be proud, rightful parents of a child. And why not? If a partner of a ‘heterosexual couple’ is sterile or physically unable to engage in sexual reproduction (e.g. if one is HIV-positive), they would enlist the services of a sperm bank or even carry out the artificial insemination manually.
So what makes Beatie and his family any different?
That his biological gender was originally female? But couldn’t one’s gender be seen as a mentality? Or maybe it’s unacceptable because it impinges religious and moral values? Then again, not all the denominations of a religion share the same views; there are gay-friendly Christian churches all over the world.
Perhaps it’s the culture we come from, then. Beatie’s ’camp’ suscribes to a different viewpoint simply because they have been exposed to a dissimilar environment. They belong to the queer world where sometimes, married men (some of them with kids) dress up in drag at night, and members of their community regularly fight for civil rights. These subcultures view some of our issues as non-issues, and vice versa, because of the way we all identify ourselves by – our culture. If we had been taught to regard it as the norm, or lived in a society that consists of individuals and families like the Beaties, we would follow a different ethos altogether.
A similar case arose in Spain - but in this case, Ruben Noe Coronado miscarried his twins. Like Beatie, Coronado has retained his female reproductive organs.
And he has planned to keep his lady parts until he is successful.
-Insert sentiment/judgment here-
wondertramp said
I guess in situations like this we begin to sit up and rethink the norms that we have been brought up with. I am just considering the trials that the child might face when growing up. The identity crisis that they might go through. How will the parents explain the story of how the child was conceived?
commsboy said
It’s a mouthful, isn’t it?
But cultures are ever-changing; they are shaped by the society of the time. At the rate we’re progressing – or moving, at least – a case like this wouldn’t cause the same reaction it did, because this one has set precedent.
In addition, the media shapes the way we view issues, and depending on the messages they carry and imprint upon us, we would develop our mindsets accordingly.
wondertramp said
I agree with you that cultures are ever changing. I am now pondering how before man invented the mass media, starting with the printed media and later evolving to what we have today, Parents played a more significant role in socializing their children thus instilling ‘culture’ into them. But now, starting from a very young age, the agent of socialization for our children is more likely to be the TV. Thus we need to pay more attention to what our children are watching on the telly and realise that not everything on TV is healthy for our children.
commsboy said
That’s why having good communicators on your staff is so important and valued. If companies in industries such as publishing and advertising can identify current cultures and subcultures, they can deliver what the masses want in terms of consumable material (e.g. books, articles, television and film) and create advertisements for popular goods and services (i.e. based on current trends).
wondertramp said
Yes, what you are saying is a view taken from the media industry point of view, of how to identify products that will sell. I am more concerned on how the media, on hoping to help sell their products may ride on unhealthy messages that would ultimately reach impressionable children who will take in the unhealthy messages.
I can’t think of any other related examples to explain myself except for this one. A couple of weeks back my 8 year old nephew came over and was almost begging me to let him play my Grant Theft Auto V video game. Apparently at his other cousin’s house, he was allowed to play the older version of the game. The game is most defintely not suitable for 8 year olds or maybe even not suitable for anyone with the amount of violence packed into the game.
commsboy said
New media that infiltrates our homes and into the minds of highly-susceptible receivers is a regular, even natural occurence now. Children and teenagers are the biggest consumers of computer games and game consoles which promote morals – morals that do not necessarily follow conventional, “wholesome” ones taught in the family unit.
Just like forms of print media that prove unsavory or unsuitable for readers of younger ages, discretion has to be advised. I think this could be one way to prevent our society from receiving and responding to negative messages, to ensure that we do not fall to negative shaping.
charmaine said
The world is definitely on the path to becoming more open about things as such, but there are still extremists who are totally against the idea of gays/lesbians. I feel that it’s their own life, so they should be able to do whatever they think is right. Ultimately, they’ll be held responsible for their own actions, and who are we to judge them anyway?
Yeah sure, the child might have an identity crisis in the process of growing up; however, if they grew up in a family which has been so open I think they’d definitely have an open mentality as well. I think it’s not so much as, “OH GOSH MY MOM LOOKS LIKE A MAN BUT SHE’S ACTUALLY A WOMAN!” as to that whatever it is, they have good parenting skills. That is definitely more paramount to having a normal family whereby your mother is a female and your dad is a male, by nature of course.
alyssa said
i would like to bring the functionalist perspective of marriage and family; it relates the functionality of having distinct family roles which are later enforced by the norms of incest taboo,which means the sexual relations between family members in a nucleated structure is strictly forbidden – this is to prevent confusion of traditional roles. if we apply this functionality to the above-mentioned union, then we can see the confusion in family roles that will arise as the child grows up.
commsboy said
alyssa: definitely, there will be the blurring or even complete remodelling of conventional gender roles, since this is unprecedented, we can but speculate on the repercussions of this deviance (see: deviance as relative to one’s culture). i understand how a conservative, protective society might react to this new “outbreak” of role reversals and “askew-age”.
commsboy said
hi charmaine! thanks for your views, and i really do feel the same way too – good parents should be judged based on parenting ability instead of “normal” gender roles taken by LGBTQ parents.
cultures are really progressing, but not everyone shares the same progressive or liberal views. again, we have to observe the media’s impact on them(Cultures), which can only come from the passing of time. are we going to allow it to take its natural toll though, and leave it to communicators/transmitters that may or may not be highly motivated by personal bias or views towards these issues? or do we take an active stand to sieve through all these propaganda and decide for ourselves?
whatbluebird said
Perhaps then, in the future, the pro-Prop 8 advertisements that were released might just come true. “Mommy, mommy! Guess what we read about in school today? A prince married a prince!”
(In this case, though, it might be “daddy” ????)
commsboy said
Hey what bluebird, have you seen some of the signs used at anti-Proposition 8 rallies? “Hate is not a family value”, “Prop 8 is H8″, and various quotes from the late gay advocate Harvey Milk. They are clever and honest bids to persuade, and they also serve to effectively lash out against Prop 8 supporters.
Aud said
LBGTQ persons/ communities arise as a result of socialisation and subcultures are formed.
Check out this website: http://www.donorsiblingregistry.com/
It’s a website for people who were conceived by people who donated their egg or sperm to help find those whom they have genetic ties with like a half sibling or their real parent or whatever.
They have about 25 000 members already and it is a registered non-profit organization!
Sub cultures evolving into mainstream culture?
But no i dont think so. Not yet anyway. As long as majority of people are not open, especially here in our country, LBGTQ persons will stay confined to the underground. But in more liberal countries, things are definitely changing at a faster pace and with websites such as the donorsiblingregistry, we see how media helps to connect members of subcultures over the world.
commsboy said
The website’s seems like a fantastic way to combat arguments against sperm donation and surrogacy, such as: identity confusion and loss of heritage.
And i agree that it takes a lot more than ‘willing & wanting’ for it to come into being – it depends on the social norms and preparedness of the general public. If it’s already widely spread and sufficiently supported, than assimilation into mainstream culture would be significantly smoother.